Sunday, March 28, 2010

A blade of grass

"I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it." -Chuck Swindoll

This quote is staring at me as I prepare to read the next chapter of Sarah Palin's book.  I used to live by these wise words and have somehow forgotten them, and how to apply them to my own life.  A friend told me once that I was like a blade of grass...when I get stomped down, I'm down for a bit and then I pop right back up.  I know that is in me somewhere but it seems lost at the moment.

Jaci Velasquez lyrics come to me..."Here I am again willing to be opened up and broken like a flower in the rain.  Tell me what I have to do to die and then be raised to reach beyond the pain like a flower in the rain."  Such a theme song of my life at one time and yet I wish I could blossom in the downtimes like I once did so well.  But I hold bitterness and hurt so much tighter now.  Why is that?

And my mind...thoughts play over and over in my mind.  What does that person think of me?  What do they say when I'm not around?   Ugh!  It is absolutely the enemy.  Even if these people do disapprove of me.  Who cares!?  God knows the motives of my heart.  He knows my heart!  All I need is to please Him and no one else. "For do I now persuade men, or God?  Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ." (Gal. 1:10)  (Haha!  My spell check doesn't recognize the word "bondservant", a reflection of culture, I guess.)
And I try to take those thoughts captive to the obedience of Jesus, but they still dominate my mind.  I must replace them with thoughts that are true.  "God is good."  "He has a plan for me."  "I am significant to Him."  "He will use me."  "He gives me passions, talents, gifts, and opportunities.  What are they?  How am I going to use them?"

So, here's to "bouncing back" no matter who may gloat or boast at your downfall.  God is picking me back up.  Why should I return to the pit?  Get out and walk away from it.  Letting no one take from me what God is doing.  Not any person, not the enemy of my soul.


  1. It's so hard for me to picture you 'wondering' what others think of you...behind your back. However, questioning is totally normal. To me, you are the epitome of confidence, goodness, generosity, love and pure joy. Such a woman of faith. I don't know of a single person who wouldn't totally agree with the above description. I will pray that you will see yourself the exact way that Jesus sees His image. I admire you so much... You are truly a genuine woman of God. Suddenly it's so simple to see where those thoughts that make you question are coming from. It's from the 'other' side. Certainly Satan tries to tear you down BECAUSE you are such a fine woman of God! If you weren't, he wouldn't waste his time on you. Trust in the Lord with all your heart & lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.
    I love you dearly, Kathy

  2. Thanks Kath! You are such an encouragement. It's so awesome because a day or two after this post, I had a major turning point regarding a situation that I have been dealing with (and the heart of where this post came from). So, the blade has sprung back up! Yea! God is so good. I think we just need time to heal and get to that place. You know? I was feeling so pressured to be there prematurely. And now I am so free! Halleluiah!
    "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are walking according to the Spirit and not according to the flesh." (Rom. 8:1) I have been knowing that in my head, but now I feel free to apply it to my heart and life and reactions. Praise the Lord!